IT'S THE MONEY SHOT!!
working towards an intellectual understanding of booty chatter.
viernes, febrero 20, 2009
D.O.G. (Drugged Out Girls) (alt): I feel like a bunch of these posts have been like "OMG, can't wait for this album", and the next Old Gold project is no exception. I've heard from an inside source that it's going to be "epic". Every show I've been to by this guy has included the most amazing mix of former cellmates, family members, friends and random folks. Love it so much.
TAKE TOO MUCH (RICH MAN) (alt): Before I die, I hope the damn music industry lets Lauryn Hill release another studio album. I don't need another damn "Doo Wop (That Thing)"... I love Lauryn no matter what she's doing--acoustic guitar, clown makeup, God-loving, whatever.
YEAH YEAH YEAHS.
STELLA BY STARLIGHT.
NOT GON' CRY (MARY J. BLIGE COVER) (alt): Tell me why I got all teary-eyed when she started talking about how much this song means to her. I can't help who I'm is! Monica's last album had so many gems on it, but the single choices were terrible. Let's hope they do better with the follow-up, even though the leaked track "Still Standing" was fucking fantastic (and worthy of Mary).
T-PAIN FEATURING LIL WAYNE.
BOY IN STATIC.
STAND WHERE A FRUIT TREE DROPS THE THINGS IT DOESN'T NEED (DAYTROTTER SESSION) (alt): I went to school with this girl. She sang a lot and it was pretty.
MOULINEX & XINOBI.
HELL TO THE NO.
First off, this leaked before Christmas (according to another forum member), so it has absolutely nothing to do with the current Rihanna and Chris Brown situation.
Second of all, how DARE you say "Awww Lets Give Him A Chance He Said He's Sorry." Sorry isn't fucking enough, douchebag.
I wasn't sold when Akon put out "Sorry (Put The Blame On Me)", so Chris Brown's lame-ass doesn't have a chance to apologize to Rihanna and the world via song. Have you seen those damn pictures? Shit was serious. He straight up assaulted her.
This forum post is just disgusting. If you are curious enough to hear the damn chipmunk churn out a whack-ass ballad, click here for the direct link.
BLAH BLAH BLAH.
jueves, febrero 19, 2009
YOUR WOMAN (WHITE TOWN COVER) (alt): People have such nostalgia for the original, so I couldn 't resist posting this cover. Princess Chelsea says, "I decided to take a slightly creepy angle on the song, creating an infusion of Dr Dre and an eight year old, perhaps singing to Bill Wyman." Word!
WORK IT (DON DIABLO REMIX) (alt): I was under the impression that Don Diablo was going to be some overrated blog-hype remixer, but his stuff actually makes up for the fact that all of Missy Elliott's recent leaks have sucked massive clitoris. I really hope something good comes out of Block Party.
AIRPLANES (alt): I've been told several times that I should have pursued a career in A&R, but there would have been one huge flaw--I'd basically sign every teenage girl who raps. There's something refreshingly not-trying-too-hard about Spree's flow that calls to mind ol' skool teen rappers like Roxanne Shante. She's like Rye Rye light, and I'm obsessed. If I owned an indie label, I'd sign this girl in a hot minute.
FINAL COUNTDOWN: CAPITALISM PART TWO.
Thanks to all the lovely folks who voted for me to be Queerty's Music reviewer. This won't be an easy win with sir Daniel Villarreal and my good digi-friend Bradley Stern as competition, but I'll never go down without a fight. All five finalists, including myself, were asked to review Empire of the Sun's Walking On A Dream. Below is my take on the album:
Luke Steele and Nick Littlemore are no strangers to success. After fronting two successful groups, The Sleepy Jackson and Pnau, the indie-gods are totally over “the band-thing”. That’s precisely why their new project, Empire of the Sun, isn’t a band—it’s an amorphous theatrical experience. Musical silly putty, if you will.In celebration of making it this far, here is Pegase's remix of the album's title track. Click through to read the rest of the reviews or vote below for me--Joe John Sanchez III! Another round of (at least 24 hour) on-the-hour posting will commence at 9:00pm.
This free-spirited outlook may intrigue theoretically, but their debut Walking On A Dream is consequently incoherent. While the first four songs flow effortlessly as a series of ‘80s-tinged pop gems, everything comes to a screeching halt with the strikingly odd stomp of “Delta Bay”. It’s inappropriately followed by “Country”, a mostly instrumental track reminiscent of “Laura’s Theme” on Twin Peaks. From there, the remaining songs recall everything from Basement Jaxx to Prince’s cheesier ballads, impressive when isolated but collectively failing to recapture the earlier magic.
The psychedelic elements and falsetto vocalizing may elicit comparisons to MGMT, but a deeper listen indicates that the androgynous duo conjure their flamboyant image from older influences. Their mix of outer-space antics, soul searching and appropriated culture calls to mind George Clinton’s P-Funk mythology and David Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust, with pitch-shifted vocals on some songs eerily evoking Bowie’s minions in Labyrinth. But unlike Jareth the Goblin King, Emperor Steele and Lord Littlemore act as benevolent leaders fixated on spreading peace, joy and colorful imagery. As contrived and idealistic as their goals may sound, they resonate heavily in our distressed times, making these boys as close to indie-pop Obamas as humanly possible.
domingo, febrero 15, 2009
laura gibson: beasts of seasons.
sábado, febrero 14, 2009
tha pumpsta: no crying at the disco.
The original version showcases Jeremy's stellar trumpet skills and boasts a video with "lighting by Lance Bass" (An appropriate joke, because somebody's gotta give him work, right?). But I'm a sucker for Black Cracker's production and Shunda K's vocal presence, so the remix gets a permanent place on my iPod (until it dies, eternal digi-love). With that said, I am definitely looking forward to hearing more trumpet and elements that aren't conventionally "hip-hop" on the upcoming album, Tha Charm.
This is a outstanding offering from a queer cast of artists, so let's keep our fingers crossed that I'll be reviewing the full album for Queerty in the near future. Speaking of which, thank you to all of you for contributing to my extreme, "unethical" lead. You never know what can happen up until Monday, so if you haven't voted yet... help a brother out!
I can't believe I just did that. I'm going to celebrate by vagina-clapping, which is pretty much the most self-promotional thing I could do right now. There's no shame on the internet (I'm lying).
Happy Valentine's Day. Don't get herpes.
VAGINA CLAP (alt)
NUMBER ONE SEX F/ R. KELLY (DEMO) (alt): Much like the Chris Brown song I posted earlier, this song falls into my favorite non-genre of unintentional gender-bending. I love hearing Keri sing about how she's the pussy champion. I hope this girl sells some albums, because she's seriously on the songwriting grind. THE END.
VOTE JOE JOHN SANCHEZ III FOR QUEERTY MUSIC REVIEWER!
viernes, febrero 13, 2009
CRUISE LOW (alt): You know I love me some Thunderheist, but I hope they're not offended by me saying that this is probably the best thing I've ever heard them do. It's got a chill, laid-back vibe a la The Clipse and a reference to "I Know What Boys Like". So necessary. THE END.--BUY IT
TOKIN' BLACK GUY.
BODY CLOCK (alt): After receiving a mysterious all-caps-lock e-mail from "Kanye West", I was intrigued by Tokin' Black Guy. But now that I've seen his top friends on the space, I'm even more fascinated. Admittedly, I'm a little disappointed, given that my friend Crystal and I had planned to start a band called TMC (Token Minorities Club). Bitch is stealing our thunder.
PUSSY QUEEN (alt): It makes me sad that there are people in this world who still don't know about Bunny Rabbit, Black Cracker and the Cult of Miracles. Can't wait for the new album! THE END.--BUY IT
N.E.R.D. (NEVER ENDING ROMANCE DISASTER) (alt): The protagonist in this song sounds like a total douche, but Anoraak's sleek electro groove keeps me coming back.
OTHER TIME (JOHAN SIGERUD REMIX) (alt): Not gonna lie. This is my bestie's song getting the Cyndi Lauper "Time After Time" '80s treatment thanks to a sweet Swedish producer. THE END.--BUY IT
REASONS (alt): When is Rye Rye going to blow up to the level that Maya and Santi are working? Love her. THE END.
RED WIRE BLACK WIRE
LOCKED OUT (alt): Another bunch of Wesleyan kids, and if they keep putting out tunes like this... they have potential to go far. THE END.--BUY IT
NASTY GIRL (alt): Fuck you, Chris Brown. THE END.
BOYZ (LEIF REMIX) (alt): Oh man, remember when M.I.A. released this single? I totally liked the non-single "Bird Flu" more, but let's not argue. I have my fingers crossed that Maya will use her baby as a fashion accessory. Imagine it--she dresses it as a watermelon and carries it around like a handbag. Visualize! Visualize! THE END.--BUY IT
WOMANIZER F/ ANDRE 3000 (BIGFADDY EDIT) (alt): Okay, I can see you judging me from a mile away, but the real star on this edit isn't Britney. Though it doesn't make much sense to put a verse about settling down (from "International Player's Anthem") on a song about a guy who fucks around, it's amazing to hear how good Three Stacks sounds on this beat. Could such a collabo ever happen in real life? No. THE END.--BUY IT
CUT OFF YOUR HANDS.
STILL FOND (alt): The Killers meets The Strokes meets someone else who used to be cool to like, but somehow less shameful. THE END.--BUY IT
ANIMALS IN THE JUNGLE F/ GIRL (alt): In the spirit of homo shit, I thought I'd embarrass myself by sharing an unreleased song from my gay rap duo. This song is so weird, a little off and makes me so happy.
IKE TURNER F/ BIG FRAZE, TOM FOOLERY & MUFFY (alt): Okay, you know I love Bangladesh. How could you deny the man who brought us "A Milli", "Bossy" and the best Ludacris songs ever recorded? And despite all my jokes, I really have my fingers crossed for Muffy. With that said, the recent Chris Brown vs. Rihanna incident has made this song even more unbearable than it was originally. Over the "Bounce" beat from Timbo's Shock Value, a chorus about beating "the track like Ike Turner" makes me cringe.
THE CAPSTAN SHAFTS.
CHERRY MAGDALENE (alt): How was I never told how much I would love this music? At times, it's slightly reminiscent of Pavement. THE END.--BUY IT
CHINESE (alt): Pretty much the perfect love song. Don't judge me for saying that. I totally hated Lily Allen until I heard this album. I'm glad she ditched the whole faux-reggae thing, and I'm glad that she can't keep her fucking mouth shut. Katy Perry can eat a bag of dicks. This is my girl! THE END.--BUY IT
RESPECT (LIVE AT MONTEREY POP FESTIVAL) (alt): One of my favorite songs of all time. Before Aretha did "Respect", Otis rocked the hell out of it. When I was younger, I used to pronounce her name as "Arethra" so it sounded a lot like urethra. Ew!--THE END.--BUY IT
DIMMER (alt): New Bishop Allen makes me insanely happy. THE END.--BUY IT
LIL WAYNE & ROBIN THICKE.
TIE MY HANDS (HURRICANE KATRINA DEDICATION LIVE AT GRAMMYS) (alt): I never enjoyed this song until I heard the live performance. I was a little disappointed that Weezy didn't launch into a big-band version of "A Milli" when the crazy breakdown happened. More importantly, how the hell did J. Hud beat Raphael Saadiq and Al Green for Best R&B Album? Love the girl, condolences go out and her album is impressive... but it really didn't deserve that award. Is it terrible for me to say that? Still, a Grammy and an Oscar in such close proximity makes me want to throw her a huge gay-ass "you go girl". THE END--BUY IT
SANDCASTLE DISCO (FREEMASONS REMIX) (alt): You know what's gayer than me being up for Queerty's next music reviewer? This remix and the fact that I enjoy it. I will take no shame for liking the latest Solange album, but there's really nothing I can say to get me out of this. THE END.--BUY IT
BAT FOR LASHES.
A FOREST (THE CURE COVER) (alt): The prospect of this cover worried me, but anything this gal does is golden. THE END.--BUY IT
VOTE JOE JOHN SANCHEZ III FOR QUEERTY MUSIC REVIEWER!
VIRGIN (WISH YOU WERE) (alt): I can't tell whether the concept of this song is romantic or entirely creepy. I lean towards creepy, but it makes me want to dance. All is forgiven. THE END.
BOY CRAZY (alt): Three of my favorite bloggers wrote about the Vistoso Bosses' "Delirious" within the same week. Weeks before this, a little bird named Travis told me that I should listen to them. "Delirious" has nothing on "Boy Crazy". Fuck guilty pleasures. This is my number one innocent pleasure. THE END.--BUY IT
THE SOUND OF ARROWS.
M.A.G.I.C. (LEO NEVILO REMIX) (alt): I really love this remix because of the mere simplicity of it. It's almost as good as the Wyclef "Perfect Gentleman" mash-up, which wasn't actually good... but damn, I really loved that song back in the day. Just 'cause she dances go-go, that don't make her a ho, no! THE END.--BUY IT
META-BLOGGING!! Because I only have a friends in real life, I'm going to depend on you all--my fake internet friends--to make my dreams come true. Departing from my standard lower-case title format, I'm going to launch a series of minimalist posts every hour starting today with... ::gasp:: capitalized titles and no doodles. If I make it into the finals for Queerty's music reviewer, I promise the return of doodles, a glorious playlist and more delicious tunes.
Etiquetas: self-promotional posts
martes, febrero 03, 2009
the bpa: i think we're gonna need a bigger boat.
Let's cut to the chase--I wrote this review of The BPA's I Think We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat for CinemaBlend. As you may have noticed, I'm pretty obsessed with this album and included two of the singles in my most recent mixtapes. The review is rather long, so here's a teaser...
The liner notes of I Think We’re Gonna Need A Bigger Boat may attempt to sell the listener a cheap mythology of “a loose-limbed jamming unit” that recorded from the 1970s to the mid-nineties, but there’s no ignoring what this really is—Norman Cook’s own version of Timbaland’s Shock Value. Unlike dear Timothy’s mish-mash of pop collaborations, the final results play out like a carefully crafted, cohesive mixtape. And if Fatboy Slim makes you a mixtape, can you really turn it down?And a bit about the song in this post...
Justin Robertson’s “Island”, as far as vocals and sheer magic go, is reminiscent of David Bowie'sUnrelated: I want to see this movie immediately. When I get a puppy, I'm definitely going to make completely meta videos like this.
Labyrinth waltz-scene accompaniment, “As The World Falls Down”. With a backing hip-hop beat more characteristic of Pharrell Williams’ work with The Clipse than “Rockefeller Skank”, this heartfelt ballad also coincidentally recalls a less-annoying rendition of Timbaland and OneRepublic’s “Apologize”. A lyrical nod to Vincent Van Gogh slicing off his own ear may be a little creepy, but succeeds in illustrating Robertson’s desperate romanticism.
Related: Posting will probably continue to be inconsistent around here until my situation changes. Expect at least a monthly mixtape. Maybe two!
(BUY IT - SITE IT - SPACE IT - WIK IT - HYPE IT)